There’s only one problem: she’s not sure she has the courage to do it alone. But once she discovers a website with a section called Suicide Partners, Aysel’s convinced she’s found her solution: a teen boy with the username FrozenRobot (aka Roman) who’s haunted by a family tragedy is looking for a partner.
This was a really moving book that dealt with mental illness, family tragedy and suicide with a surprising amount of grace.
Ultimately, a book about a teen suicide pact is never going to be the most cheery of reads. This could have gone so badly wrong and turned into an utter misery-fest, but instead it turned out to be a gentle, emotional and ultimately hopeful story.
Aysel was an excellent narrator and although I didn’t fully buy into the reasoning behind her decision to kill herself (she mentioned the hard time she was getting at school and her difficult home life, but I didn’t see evidence of either of those things) I could get behind her as a character. She showed a lot of development as a character across the novel and by the end I really loved her.
Roman I could take or leave. His situation was so much worse than Aysel’s and I could totally see why he felt he could no longer go on, but I didn’t like the way he kept trying to guilt Aysel into sticking with their pact, telling her not to flake out on him, when she was so obviously starting to get a more hopeful outlook on life. I did like the dynamic between Roman and Aysel in the bits where he wasn’t guilting her, though. They had a very sweet friendship that blossomed slowly into romance.
Although there was an emphasis on ‘My Love Will Save You’ (which I don’t think is a great message to be sending across - especially when dealing with depression and suicide. After all, who in real life meets their significant other on a website dedicated to making suicide pacts with strangers) there was also an emphasis on the power of actually talking to someone about your problems.
The narrative was emotional without being gloomy and often used humour to lighten the tension and if the plot was a bit low on action it was made up for with the exploration of a really relevant and important issue.